


Fragments.

by locrianrose



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-19
Updated: 2014-05-19
Packaged: 2018-01-25 17:23:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1656419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/locrianrose/pseuds/locrianrose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Because what are we even anymore other than fragments of what we were before.<br/>What came after.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fragments.

Your name is Terezi Pyrope, and you don't care.

You don't know if it's been minutes or seconds or whatever it has or could have been, and all you can remember is the fact that nothing is real, and all you want is for it to end. There's too much to see, and everything that you're feeling is burning into you and all you can think is that you deserve this you are wrong you are wrong and you should have never acted and you never should have even lasted as long as you did and please please please just let it all end. Every part of you is hurting and you just want it to stop, more than you ever did during those three years but that small part of you is still there insisting that so long as your useful you'll live and there's still a chance and please he wouldn't kill you or really hurt you and you just have to survive and make it all through this and just let someone come and end this but no one ever did and no one ever will-

But then you hear the sound of a chainsaw buzzing and suddenly you’re falling-tumbling back down- and you expect it to just be him again jerking you back up but this time when you hit the ground there’s someone there and please just let it all end because you don’t know what to do and then they're trying to shift you and you see the white skin shining dimly as Kanaya removes the bloodstained bandanna and you just want to die and nothing else as you stare up at her blankly, seeing the purple blood splattered on her skin, standing out starkly against her paleness and you see the pity in her eyes as she looks at you and you hate it you hate yourself and everything that you have become and you just please want to die.

"K-Kanaya-" You rasp up at her, barely able to speak, unable to think because it hurts so much.

"He's gone." Is her cool response, but you can't stop the panic that's coursing through you as you struggle to move, still wanting to run after all this time he'll still find you please no anything but that you cant do that and you want to just die.

"Terezi?" You can't move to look as you hear another voice but you hear him saying your name, and then he's there and his arms are around you and he's rocking you back and forth in his arms and that hurts but you don't want him to stop and he only came after all that time and you're dying and there's nothing that he can do and please just let it all end.

You see him above you, and you can't even move and so many things are broken and you try to move but something snags in your lungs and the noise that escapes your lips that's a cross between a croak and a sob and you see him above you, and you hear him distantly shouting at you, begging with you and ordering you to stay alive but what can you do, and then you see purple and everything goes dark and you can't do anything or move or cry and then you're somewhere else and your staring into the sky and you don't know how long it is till you hear the familiar lisping voice speaking to you and you finally try to move, crying out as your battered and broken body rejects you.

"TZ?"

You can't even reply at this point, but he's there, and Sollux Captor is blindly finding his way to you and then you feel the hand on your face and you flinch away as he tried to pap you and you're a shaking mess and you don't know how long it is till he stops papping you and you hear him talking and then you finally manage to control your breath and you look at him, and you hate the fact that you can see him but he can't see you because you were so stupid as to do what you did and then you're crying again, trying to apologize and he pities you and you hate that anyone would feel that way about you but you pity him too and you just want to try to relax but you're tense and you hear him speaking to you and you finally manage to focus enough to tell what he is saying to you.

“TZ, shut up and listen. You need to calm down, and stop freaking out. You’re safe now, but you won’t be able to heal until you calm the fuck down. Listen to me.”

Your name is Terezi Pyrope, and you are trying to calm down and look at the troll who is papping you and for once someone is pitying you that way and you just want to return that favor but you can’t help but flinch away from him as he comforts you, but you finally stop, curling into him and sobbing, eventually starting to come to your senses enough to separate the memory of your wounds from what is real, and then you're finally able to wrap your arms around him , crying into his shoulder as your wounds fade into memory and you’re finally able to look at him clearly as he paps you, and then you realise where you are.

You are ashamed at who you are. What you’ve become, and now you’re sitting here being papped by Sollux “asshole” Captor, and all you want to do is cry but you know what you did.

“Sorry.” You tell him, but before you can continue he’s already started talking.

“Shut up, TZ. Yeah, you were stupid, but you’re dead now.” He lisps as you. “Shut up and listen to me. I don’t know what happened, but you show up here with blood like that and I know something about what it must have been. If you want to tell me about it, then do. If not, that's fine. Just don’t sit here and cry about it all. It won’t help. Are you going to tell me what happened?”

“Yes?" You begin uncertainly, and then you start to talk, telling him everything from when Vriska died and you feel like for the first time someone is listening and when he finally looks at you and calls you an idiot you know he understands and he talks about Aradia and tells you that it'll be fine, even if you are a dumbass, and for the first time since you killed your sister you're finally able to look at someone and know that they understand.

Time passes and the two of you finally lapse into causally insulting each other and you're able to joke and how long has it even been since you could do this and he takes you with him to find Aradia and the three of you are able to talk and laugh and for just a little while you're able to forget where the others are and if Aradia catches you looking away for too long or when you start to shake she'll nudge Sollux and he'll take you aside and you'll talk until you manage to return to the present, and other times you catch Sollux doing little things; depreciating himself or trying to avoid the others you'll go talk to him, and it'll be better after a few minutes.

Your name is Terezi Pyrope, and for the first time in three years, you have hope and you can manage to hope that you’ll see Karkat again and even though it terrifies you you start looking for Vriska when you’re in the bubbles, and hoping that you’ll find her and Sollux tells you that you need to stop worrying and that Vriska is too much of a jerk to worry about but he seems to respect that you need to talk to her, even if he won’t talk to you about it as much as anything else.

You’re terrified of seeing Gamzee, and when you see the other clown you can’t move from shaking for who knows how long-time didn’t move the same here- but Sollux managed to calm you down, and you manage to realize that he’s someone different, and then you meet Latula and Mituna and both you and Sollux act disgusted by the fact that your dancestors are matesprits but you know that he doesn't really mind and then you finally whisper to him that day after you finish joking about what happened with your dancestors, because he is your Moirail now, and you are his, and as much of a jerk he chooses to at like, you know that he cares.

But then the bubbles change, and suddenly things are shaking and how much time has it even been and the other Clown and Nepeta’s dancestor are with Mituna and you’re running with Sollux and Aradia to try to stop them and you finally see Vriska with Meenah, and you spot Nepeta and Equius, and the others all gathering for the the end, and then you see them, Dave and Karkat and Kanaya and Rose and everyone who was still alive and the humans, and then you see Gamzee again with Kurloz-as Sollux told you his name was- and Aradia’s dancestor then Sollux is furious as he sees his matesprit flying away from him to join them, betraying her friends for the Lord who wants to kill them all and he is furious and you can’t pap him till after the battle is over and done and another cherub has claimed Lord English’s body and he’s someone else now, and one of the humans is with him (her?) and talking to someone named Callie.

You see Kanaya speaking with Rose in the distance, and you want to go ask her about Karkat but your moirail needs you now, so you stay with him, trying in somewhat to do for him what he did for you when you came here. You comfort him about Aradia, and you help him to look for her in the wreckage even though you don’t know what you think about the whole situation. You stumble upon Mituna babbling over his moirail who seems to be coughing something purple up and you have to go find Latula and try to send her to take care of Mituna, and she thanks you and then goes to her matesprit, and you continue looking for Sollux, as you lost track of him when you were going to find Latula.

You find him shouting at Aradia, sparks crackling over the heads, and her smug attitude is still there and eventually you have to just lead him away from her, your words of comfort mixed with insults just like they always are between you two. You lead him away from her and back to the others where they’re gathering and Vriska is waiting for you.

“I was right about you. You hadn’t changed then, after all that time, right?” Vriska grins at you, and you look down, and then she’s giving you a hug and Sollux is giving you a look that clearly states that he thinks you’re an idiot from what he can hear.

“Sorry.” You mumble into her shoulder, and she elbows you.

“Hey. Sisters forgive. Right?” She holds out a hand to you, and for once you think you’re ready for this, if it’ll mean forgiveness for what you did.

“Right.” You nod and take the offered hand, and shake it, and a little more of the weight on you lifts as you look into her eyes.

“The Scrouge Sisters ride again!” She declares loudly, and you shake your head.

“I don’t know about that.” But you know that you have your friend, your sister back for once, and that is good, even if you know that you’ll hear about it from your moirail.

You talk with Vriska, and eventually you part ways and you can’t help but grin at Sollux as everyone talks, but then you see Karkat talking with one of the humans, Jade, and you want to go talk with him, but you don’t know what to say so you stay with Sollux and poke fun at Eridan with him until Aradia walks over awkwardly, grabbing Sollux’s hand and taking him away to talk with him and you’re pretty sure that your moirail will be fine.

You stop teasing Eridan and look around, and then you feel someone tapping your shoulder, and you look to see Karkat standing there, scowling at you.

Your name is Terezi Pyrope, and you are conflicted because Karkat Vantas just hugged you and is currently telling you what an idiot you are and asking why you didn’t come to him sooner, and all you can think is that you’re friends again? And that’s all you want right now, but you don’t know what to say to him. You stumble over an apology, but you hear him saying the same things back to you, but then Sollux is back plus Aradia who is pointedly ignoring the glares some of the other trolls are giving her.

“Sup, KK.” He offers, and you’re glad that he’s here because you still don’t know what to say.

“Hey asshole.” Karkat says to him, and you can tell that Karkat is glad to see Sollux, even if they both can’t stop insulting each other.

You see Dave, and he nods to you uncertainly, and you wave back. You don’t know what will be there, or if there even is anything still, but you can figure it out later. It looks like you’ll have time now, because as you look around you know that your name is Terezi Pyrope, and you are with your friends and you are safe and for once you are happy as well.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! The rest of the story won't be written in this format-this was just the way for me to stream Terezi's thoughts. Please let me know if anything doesn't make sense or if I make a typo! Thanks for reading! Let me know if there's anyone who you really want to see the POV of in future chapters!


End file.
